I enjoyed reading it, thanks for posting. Looking forward to reading more.
0
Juni's art thread
Started by
Juni Ori
, Apr 29 2006 06:57 AM
138 replies to this topic
#91
Frodo
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Your neck looks very... tasty!
Posted 06 July 2007 - 09:00 PM
Great work Juni I enjoyed reading it, thanks for posting.
Looking forward to reading more.
I enjoyed reading it, thanks for posting. Looking forward to reading more.
Please click on my dragons to help them grow - 
#92
Juni Ori
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- Members
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Gaming Guru
Posted 07 July 2007 - 06:13 PM
STORY OF TAI CARA - PART 2
Thanks to Frodo again for helping hand! And let's not forget Taikara's influense!
Quote
First snow came and Eador and his men didn't return. Chief, Saador, young and able man, sent scouts to search them. Scouts came back ten days later without knowledge of Eador's whereabouts. After month weather became too bad and Saador gave up. Not much later snow closed the village. It was coldest winter in decades.
During winter months Alesha was easily able to hide her growing belly, but she knew she would have to flee before spring. It was far too obvious that child's father couldn't be Eador. No matter if he never came back, she had violated the law and ancient law demanded demanded atonement decided by spouse. If Eador was declared lost, his closest family members, father and brothers in this case, would decide the punishment.
She was so afraid. She made preparations in secret and succeeded growing her food reserves. She had to leave at once the spring came. Her secret was at danger to be revealed every day. What if she hurt herself and needed help? What if is she became ill?
Weather began warming and snow melting. She readied her equipment and prepared food for days, so she wouldn't need to rely on nature's very limited givings. She took Eador's smaller axe he had left home in addition to her own. She belted her waist and went out on very early hour. It was still dark and it was cloudy, so the guards might not realize her significant load.
"Good morning," she greeted the guards, hoping they wouldn't notice her little shaky voice.
"Good morning. Going out so early?" sleepy guard answered. She couldn't recognize him.
"Yes, I have to..." she startled, she hadn't thought of any excuse. "I have to... go to find some... I'm going to the river, I have lots of dirty clothes I want to clean."
Guard nodded yawning. "Be careful, don't fall to the river. Do you have axe heavy enough to break the water?"
Her heart bouncing she showed her own axe by accident, meaning to show Eador's, so she'd get out as soon as possible.
"Hah, you need heavier, you can loan this one," guard laughed offering his own.
"But you stand sentry, don't you need it?"
"Don't worry, I have another in the shelter," guard answered pointing toward their crude shelter. Other guard was sitting ther by the fire and he showed her spare axe.
"Oh, okay, thank you. Thank you a lot. I guess I'll better go, I have a lot to do," she said heading out. She was actually horrified that she was actually stealing from a friendly guard, who was only helping. She decided to leave the axe to the river, where they used to wash their laundry. She also realised she had to go to the river. Going other direction would grow guards' suspicions.
She hurried to the river and left the axe there. She realized she'd never see again her loved ones. She dug stones and sand under the snow and formed them to say "sorry" to the snow.
To everybody's surprise, Eador led his men to the village the very same day. They had been caught in the middle of the snow, but managed to survive over the winter, losing only one man. By the sunset he began to wonder where her wife was. Alesha's sign was noticed, but nobody had realized its meaning. When all pieces put together, they realized she had gone. Witch gave a serious thought to the situation and guessed right, though she wasn't sure.
"Eador, we need to speak, but I have to ask you to think everything I'm about telling you."
"Speak, witch," shamed Eador replied. He knew that he'd be laughed at, though behind his back, because he was too dangerous and short-tempered. He'd challenge anyone laughing at him and most likely he'd win. Abandoned husband, or wife, wasn't crime, but very humiliating act to do. He'd be having very hard time finding a new wife, if he'd ever get one.
Witch began telling what had happened at autumn, but not revealing her own suspicions. Eador thought long before answering.
"So what if she... was..." he began to understand and stood up.
"Listen. There was probably some Might and I don't believe that there's much sense in meddling with their deeds."
Eador didn't listen. His wife had disgraced herself and fled! She had abandoned them all, shaming her husband, her own family and whole clan! Rage grew inside him. He struck the table with his fist, almost breaking one of the table top planks into two. Witch tried to calm him down, but he just pushed her aside, which was in normal conditions a serious crime. He picked his heavier axe and ran outside and out of the village, to the river and began tracking.
She had been on the run for four days. She had wandered onward, not knowing where to go, saving her strength. It was already past noon when she rose hillside heading to woods to get wood for campfire. All of the sudden massive beast came out of the woods and she froze from fear. She had never encountered snowlion, but she had no doubts what creature she was staring at. Beast turned his head towards her and shook his thick mane. Then he turned his head back to the lower ground and began growling.
Alesha turned slowly her head, not willing to leave beast out of her vision. After several seconds, she took a quick look down and shocked, Eador was there! She still kept her eyes in the snowlion and took a good, firm grip of her axe. All her moves were slow. Snowlion stepped forward, clearly to confront Eador. His path would go only two meters from Alesha. Following majestic animals move, Alesha got both of her adversaries into sight. Eador had halted, after noticing the lion.
Lion roared deafening Alesha. He was only two meters away from her. Echo, which Alesha couldn't hear, answered from a nearby cliff. Eador backed few steps, he was in very bad position, and tried to get into leveled ground. He found a position and readied himself. Alesha coulnd't believe she hadn't attacked when beast had been so close and ignoring her! Eador might be an enemy, but of the two, she'd rather confront Eador, not the lion. And she couldn't leave anyone, not even him, without help in such a distress.
But still she left. She saw beast leaping easily last meters and manaded to catch Eador by surprise, who's axe swung too late. Front paws landed to his shoulders, falling him to ground. Battle was inevitably over. Massive jaws closed around his throat and after few moments there was no movement under the lion. Alesha shook uncontrollably and she didn't understand there was anything wrong, when bloodcovered snout turned to her and seemed almost to nod.
Then the lion was gone. He had only slain Eador, leaving him otherwise untouched.
After weeks weather turned warmer and Alesha managed to get the horrific image off of her head. She had buried her husband back there and moved on. She didn't no exactly where she was, but she had noticed that settlements, which she had carefully avoided, were behind. Here she was all alone, except someone or something, that she believed was following her in shadows, unseen.
She found a idyllic place to stay in a tiny island on a river, surrounded by woods. There were three big trees, kind fo she had never seen, on the island. It was more a heap of gravel and mud in the middle of the river. River itself was quite shallow and about five meters wide. There she built a shelter and began building a cabin into the middle of the trees. Spring was beginning to turn into summer and she realized that the river might flood at springs. She restarted building, now couple of meters off the ground.
Her growing belly hindered the work and she realized she'll be giving birth soon. Fear and concern overwhelmed her mind and she worked harder and harder to get her cabin ready.
Mid-summer came and the child was late. A lot. Cabin was ready and she had prepared for some time, but in vain. Her concern grew day by day. Something was very wrong. Her belly was quite big, but was it big enough? Weren't some pregnant women a lot bigger than she was now? She felt good and was able to gather food and take care of daily errands. Perhaps the child took longer to grow than normally?
Autumn came and her belly had grown bigger. Too big in her opinion. She couldn't gather as much food as she used to and she was afraid how she'd make it through the winter? She prayed Dor again, pleading for help. Next morning she woke up to a annoyingly familiar roar. There he was again, on her island, dead deer on his feet. Alesha could had sworn that he nodded to her, before leaping over the river and disappearing to the woods.
She thanked Dor in a deep prayer, before descending from her cabin. Deer had lots of welcome meat and hide. After rough day she had raw hide drying and meat treated with herbs and little salt she had left. When sun had set and she had went sleeping, her contractions began and soon after her waters broke.
Night passed with terrible pains and in morning light she realized the surrounding woods were silent, like dead. Familiar presence grew stronger, first almost sneaking in, later on too powerful to describe. Her pains faded a bit and she began to feel more comfortable. Again, she didn't remember exactly what happened, but she had an image of tall figure knelt next to her, holding her hand and helping her over the birth.
When she woke again, she was alone, small beautiful baby girl on her arms. Somehow she knew her name should be Tai Cara.
During winter months Alesha was easily able to hide her growing belly, but she knew she would have to flee before spring. It was far too obvious that child's father couldn't be Eador. No matter if he never came back, she had violated the law and ancient law demanded demanded atonement decided by spouse. If Eador was declared lost, his closest family members, father and brothers in this case, would decide the punishment.
She was so afraid. She made preparations in secret and succeeded growing her food reserves. She had to leave at once the spring came. Her secret was at danger to be revealed every day. What if she hurt herself and needed help? What if is she became ill?
Weather began warming and snow melting. She readied her equipment and prepared food for days, so she wouldn't need to rely on nature's very limited givings. She took Eador's smaller axe he had left home in addition to her own. She belted her waist and went out on very early hour. It was still dark and it was cloudy, so the guards might not realize her significant load.
"Good morning," she greeted the guards, hoping they wouldn't notice her little shaky voice.
"Good morning. Going out so early?" sleepy guard answered. She couldn't recognize him.
"Yes, I have to..." she startled, she hadn't thought of any excuse. "I have to... go to find some... I'm going to the river, I have lots of dirty clothes I want to clean."
Guard nodded yawning. "Be careful, don't fall to the river. Do you have axe heavy enough to break the water?"
Her heart bouncing she showed her own axe by accident, meaning to show Eador's, so she'd get out as soon as possible.
"Hah, you need heavier, you can loan this one," guard laughed offering his own.
"But you stand sentry, don't you need it?"
"Don't worry, I have another in the shelter," guard answered pointing toward their crude shelter. Other guard was sitting ther by the fire and he showed her spare axe.
"Oh, okay, thank you. Thank you a lot. I guess I'll better go, I have a lot to do," she said heading out. She was actually horrified that she was actually stealing from a friendly guard, who was only helping. She decided to leave the axe to the river, where they used to wash their laundry. She also realised she had to go to the river. Going other direction would grow guards' suspicions.
She hurried to the river and left the axe there. She realized she'd never see again her loved ones. She dug stones and sand under the snow and formed them to say "sorry" to the snow.
To everybody's surprise, Eador led his men to the village the very same day. They had been caught in the middle of the snow, but managed to survive over the winter, losing only one man. By the sunset he began to wonder where her wife was. Alesha's sign was noticed, but nobody had realized its meaning. When all pieces put together, they realized she had gone. Witch gave a serious thought to the situation and guessed right, though she wasn't sure.
"Eador, we need to speak, but I have to ask you to think everything I'm about telling you."
"Speak, witch," shamed Eador replied. He knew that he'd be laughed at, though behind his back, because he was too dangerous and short-tempered. He'd challenge anyone laughing at him and most likely he'd win. Abandoned husband, or wife, wasn't crime, but very humiliating act to do. He'd be having very hard time finding a new wife, if he'd ever get one.
Witch began telling what had happened at autumn, but not revealing her own suspicions. Eador thought long before answering.
"So what if she... was..." he began to understand and stood up.
"Listen. There was probably some Might and I don't believe that there's much sense in meddling with their deeds."
Eador didn't listen. His wife had disgraced herself and fled! She had abandoned them all, shaming her husband, her own family and whole clan! Rage grew inside him. He struck the table with his fist, almost breaking one of the table top planks into two. Witch tried to calm him down, but he just pushed her aside, which was in normal conditions a serious crime. He picked his heavier axe and ran outside and out of the village, to the river and began tracking.
She had been on the run for four days. She had wandered onward, not knowing where to go, saving her strength. It was already past noon when she rose hillside heading to woods to get wood for campfire. All of the sudden massive beast came out of the woods and she froze from fear. She had never encountered snowlion, but she had no doubts what creature she was staring at. Beast turned his head towards her and shook his thick mane. Then he turned his head back to the lower ground and began growling.
Alesha turned slowly her head, not willing to leave beast out of her vision. After several seconds, she took a quick look down and shocked, Eador was there! She still kept her eyes in the snowlion and took a good, firm grip of her axe. All her moves were slow. Snowlion stepped forward, clearly to confront Eador. His path would go only two meters from Alesha. Following majestic animals move, Alesha got both of her adversaries into sight. Eador had halted, after noticing the lion.
Lion roared deafening Alesha. He was only two meters away from her. Echo, which Alesha couldn't hear, answered from a nearby cliff. Eador backed few steps, he was in very bad position, and tried to get into leveled ground. He found a position and readied himself. Alesha coulnd't believe she hadn't attacked when beast had been so close and ignoring her! Eador might be an enemy, but of the two, she'd rather confront Eador, not the lion. And she couldn't leave anyone, not even him, without help in such a distress.
But still she left. She saw beast leaping easily last meters and manaded to catch Eador by surprise, who's axe swung too late. Front paws landed to his shoulders, falling him to ground. Battle was inevitably over. Massive jaws closed around his throat and after few moments there was no movement under the lion. Alesha shook uncontrollably and she didn't understand there was anything wrong, when bloodcovered snout turned to her and seemed almost to nod.
Then the lion was gone. He had only slain Eador, leaving him otherwise untouched.
After weeks weather turned warmer and Alesha managed to get the horrific image off of her head. She had buried her husband back there and moved on. She didn't no exactly where she was, but she had noticed that settlements, which she had carefully avoided, were behind. Here she was all alone, except someone or something, that she believed was following her in shadows, unseen.
She found a idyllic place to stay in a tiny island on a river, surrounded by woods. There were three big trees, kind fo she had never seen, on the island. It was more a heap of gravel and mud in the middle of the river. River itself was quite shallow and about five meters wide. There she built a shelter and began building a cabin into the middle of the trees. Spring was beginning to turn into summer and she realized that the river might flood at springs. She restarted building, now couple of meters off the ground.
Her growing belly hindered the work and she realized she'll be giving birth soon. Fear and concern overwhelmed her mind and she worked harder and harder to get her cabin ready.
Mid-summer came and the child was late. A lot. Cabin was ready and she had prepared for some time, but in vain. Her concern grew day by day. Something was very wrong. Her belly was quite big, but was it big enough? Weren't some pregnant women a lot bigger than she was now? She felt good and was able to gather food and take care of daily errands. Perhaps the child took longer to grow than normally?
Autumn came and her belly had grown bigger. Too big in her opinion. She couldn't gather as much food as she used to and she was afraid how she'd make it through the winter? She prayed Dor again, pleading for help. Next morning she woke up to a annoyingly familiar roar. There he was again, on her island, dead deer on his feet. Alesha could had sworn that he nodded to her, before leaping over the river and disappearing to the woods.
She thanked Dor in a deep prayer, before descending from her cabin. Deer had lots of welcome meat and hide. After rough day she had raw hide drying and meat treated with herbs and little salt she had left. When sun had set and she had went sleeping, her contractions began and soon after her waters broke.
Night passed with terrible pains and in morning light she realized the surrounding woods were silent, like dead. Familiar presence grew stronger, first almost sneaking in, later on too powerful to describe. Her pains faded a bit and she began to feel more comfortable. Again, she didn't remember exactly what happened, but she had an image of tall figure knelt next to her, holding her hand and helping her over the birth.
When she woke again, she was alone, small beautiful baby girl on her arms. Somehow she knew her name should be Tai Cara.
Thanks to Frodo again for helping hand! And let's not forget Taikara's influense!
...70 years... LOL
#93
Frodo
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Your neck looks very... tasty!
Posted 07 July 2007 - 07:28 PM
This is brilliant writing Juni.
I really feel for her, cos she is so afraid to stay in the village. Then her fear as she tries to flee, and her confrontation with Eador in the mountains, and the snowlion killing him.
And her concern about her pregnancy is really touching. Her child was late, and then she didn't have much food.
And finally Tai Cara is born.
It's a very passionite story. I love it.
I really feel for her, cos she is so afraid to stay in the village. Then her fear as she tries to flee, and her confrontation with Eador in the mountains, and the snowlion killing him.
And her concern about her pregnancy is really touching. Her child was late, and then she didn't have much food.
And finally Tai Cara is born.
It's a very passionite story. I love it.
Please click on my dragons to help them grow -
#94
Juni Ori
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Gaming Guru
Posted 08 July 2007 - 02:06 AM
STORY OF TAI CARA - PART 3
Once again, thanks to Frodo and Tai. Hopefully there're more readers than Frodo alone! 
Edit: Oops, couple of stupid typos fixed. Thanks to Frodo for pointing them out. Sorry for small ones, I'm not going to go hunting them.
Quote
Winter came in hard, but twice or so per month the lion carried prey to her. She actually gained weight during the winter months, but Tai Cara grew very slowly. Disturbingly slowly, but in every other way she seemed healthy. All the time Alesha felt Tai Cara's presence just like she had felt the presence at the woods and at Tai's birth. And the presence grew as the time past.
When spring came and snow melted away, Alesha felt sudden grow in her presence. It took some time before she realized, that it wasn't Tai, but very similar, only stronger presence. And it was closing her. She had felt it twice before. She grabbed her daughter and held her tight on her chest, stepping outside to the balcony. Snowlion was at the southern shore.
Lion leaped over the river to her island and sat down, staring to south, obviously waiting for something. Then the presence grew overwhelming and he was there. He was taller than any man Alesha had ever seen, more handsome than she had ever dreamed possible and he glowed some invisible radiation of strength and majesty. Alesha realized she was shocked when he didn't walk on water, but instead had to ford the river.
"Alesha, my queen, may I enter your realm?" he asked before stepping to her island.
She was unable to answer, but succeeded in nodding. Man came ashore and rose the ladders to the balcony. Alesha was shaking visibly.
"Fear not, I'm here to apologize and see our daughter."
"Who... what are you?"
"I thought you had guessed already," he answered smiling.
"You are Dor, aren't you?"
"Yes and you are my queen, if you accept my proposal. But I must warn you, I'm going to war soon and we will be apart very long time. Also, war is always war and I may never return. That is actually the reason I chose you to be mother to my child. That, and the fact that you are of best ancestry adors have ever had. If I never come back, she will be mother to all legal kings adors will ever have."
Alesha invited her inside and offered him water. Dor sat down and picked a pitcher and two chalices from his sack he was carrying. Red, sweet liquid poured to the chalice. It had a slight shade of gold. Dor filled both chalices and handed another over to Alesha.
"Do you know why my pregnancy took so long and why she is growing so slowly?" Alesha dared to ask.
"I don't know exactly, but I believe it's normal. She may be growing slow, but she will become strong and powerful."
Alesha found it unbelieveable that she was talking to a Might so casually, even though of very legendary issues. His presence was very comfortable and she realized she had fell in love. In very deep love. The time passed as Dor told her about things she should know and pass to their daughter, if he never came back from war. He also gave lots of useful items, tools, cutlery and pots. And plenty of salt.
"I have also ordered Uran to protect you two by all means. I hope he hasn't scared you?"
"When he killed Eador, I was scared to death, but after that I realized he was only protecting me. And after he began to feed us, I've trusted him and began to actually like him."
"He killed ador? Why?"
"He was my husband, who was chasing me."
"Was he a threat to you?"
Alesha felt suddenly angered and exploded with rage.
"Why did you have to pick me? I was married! My life was not perfect, but all my life was there! You should had chosen some of the unmarried maids! You should..." she hesitated. She was shouting to Might! But Dor seemed to be calm and smiled gently.
"Great faiths have always been heavy burden and tested people. As I said earlier, your blood/soul (in their language there's only one word for blood and soul) is excellent, possibly best ever. So I couldn't had even considered anyone else but you. This is both a great honor and a great burden and I'm doing all I can to help you."
"Why don't you take me to The Grove?" Dor's Throne was in The Grove at Maiden Rocks, at the place, where he had first landed on Tine, their world.
"You must live here hidden from lemenian eyes, for if we lose and they find out your and Tai Cara's existence, they will do everything to hunt you down. You wouldn't be safe anywhere at all. But Uran will protect you and get you meat. He is very intelligent cat and furiously loyal to us."
"Looks like I have no choises, but to submit."
"I don't want you to submit. I want you to do this willingly, or not at all."
Alesha thought about her situation. She had absolutely nowhere to go, she had a cabin here and she loved her daughter. How could she refuse? And in addition to that all she had fell in love to Dor. She also realized he had to be very well aware of other's thoughts.
"I bet you know exactly why I have no choises."
"I trust she'll be taken good care of."
Dor took several packages of food from his sack and five bottles of honeywine, most wanted drink in all North. Night was slowly covering the lands.
"Are you leaving so soon, at this hour?"
"I thought you and baby need to get some sleep."
"I hoped you'd stay for a while..." She definitely didn't want this man - or better said much greater being - to leave. She wanted feel him, touch him, love him.
"I can stay for the night at least. It will be nice change from every day responsibilities."
She didn't believe her ears: Might had responsibilities? What responsibilities he might have? Couldn't he just... No, of course nothing worked so easily. He had to make decisions, think things thoroughly and take care of lot of things.
In the end, Dor spent four nights with her. Four nights she wouldn't ever forget. Nights she'd never trade for anything.
After Dor's departure life continued as normal as it could in their isolated haven. Tai grew very slowly, but now Alesha was sure everything was fine. Uran brought plenty of prey to them and in the end Alesha began to almost enjoy her life. By autumn she had her cabin filled with hides and salted meat. She didn't even know what she would do with all of it. At least Uran didn't need food for winter, his snow-white fur and superb hunting skills guaranteed his survival.
It was quite funny, actually, to pet beast three or four times her weight. He was also quite playful, but never threatened Tai Cara's or her health. If Alesha wasn't carrying Tai Cara, he might even jump on her, pushing her over to the river. One more proof he wasn't going to hurt her in any way, not even by accident. Hard ground was far more dangerous to fall on than water.
Winter was over soon, it was far easier than last two had been. Spring and summer went by and they didn't even hear of anyone. Tai Cara was clearly growing, but slowly. They didn't hear a word from Dor. Of course he was occupied with war and everything. Dor had told her that decisive battles were delayed by year or two, because preparations took more time than he had anticipated. Also lemenians had encountered serious problems after initial victories. Their offensive had stalled soon after first land gains to difficulties in maintenance. Lack of roads and difficult terrain were far worse hindrance they had believed.
She managed to find a find a spot where a rare plant called witchblade grew. It had relaxing and euphoric effect when it's leaves were smoked and usually witches demanded them all to their own use. It could also be used to spice up food, but it was too rare and too tasteless for that. Alesha gathered a small stock of it's leaves and succeeded making a primitive pipe. Then she began to greet full moon with a pipe and a chalice of honeywine. And only then she used them.
Another winter and another year. Time flew by, but she wasn't actually complaining. She had everything she needed but company. Uran was of some company, but it wasn't the same, she wanted to hear talk and began waiting for when Tai would learn to speak. And when she was only three years old, looking still like a year and a half or so old, she spoke. Not too well yet, but well enough they could talk a little.
When spring came and snow melted away, Alesha felt sudden grow in her presence. It took some time before she realized, that it wasn't Tai, but very similar, only stronger presence. And it was closing her. She had felt it twice before. She grabbed her daughter and held her tight on her chest, stepping outside to the balcony. Snowlion was at the southern shore.
Lion leaped over the river to her island and sat down, staring to south, obviously waiting for something. Then the presence grew overwhelming and he was there. He was taller than any man Alesha had ever seen, more handsome than she had ever dreamed possible and he glowed some invisible radiation of strength and majesty. Alesha realized she was shocked when he didn't walk on water, but instead had to ford the river.
"Alesha, my queen, may I enter your realm?" he asked before stepping to her island.
She was unable to answer, but succeeded in nodding. Man came ashore and rose the ladders to the balcony. Alesha was shaking visibly.
"Fear not, I'm here to apologize and see our daughter."
"Who... what are you?"
"I thought you had guessed already," he answered smiling.
"You are Dor, aren't you?"
"Yes and you are my queen, if you accept my proposal. But I must warn you, I'm going to war soon and we will be apart very long time. Also, war is always war and I may never return. That is actually the reason I chose you to be mother to my child. That, and the fact that you are of best ancestry adors have ever had. If I never come back, she will be mother to all legal kings adors will ever have."
Alesha invited her inside and offered him water. Dor sat down and picked a pitcher and two chalices from his sack he was carrying. Red, sweet liquid poured to the chalice. It had a slight shade of gold. Dor filled both chalices and handed another over to Alesha.
"Do you know why my pregnancy took so long and why she is growing so slowly?" Alesha dared to ask.
"I don't know exactly, but I believe it's normal. She may be growing slow, but she will become strong and powerful."
Alesha found it unbelieveable that she was talking to a Might so casually, even though of very legendary issues. His presence was very comfortable and she realized she had fell in love. In very deep love. The time passed as Dor told her about things she should know and pass to their daughter, if he never came back from war. He also gave lots of useful items, tools, cutlery and pots. And plenty of salt.
"I have also ordered Uran to protect you two by all means. I hope he hasn't scared you?"
"When he killed Eador, I was scared to death, but after that I realized he was only protecting me. And after he began to feed us, I've trusted him and began to actually like him."
"He killed ador? Why?"
"He was my husband, who was chasing me."
"Was he a threat to you?"
Alesha felt suddenly angered and exploded with rage.
"Why did you have to pick me? I was married! My life was not perfect, but all my life was there! You should had chosen some of the unmarried maids! You should..." she hesitated. She was shouting to Might! But Dor seemed to be calm and smiled gently.
"Great faiths have always been heavy burden and tested people. As I said earlier, your blood/soul (in their language there's only one word for blood and soul) is excellent, possibly best ever. So I couldn't had even considered anyone else but you. This is both a great honor and a great burden and I'm doing all I can to help you."
"Why don't you take me to The Grove?" Dor's Throne was in The Grove at Maiden Rocks, at the place, where he had first landed on Tine, their world.
"You must live here hidden from lemenian eyes, for if we lose and they find out your and Tai Cara's existence, they will do everything to hunt you down. You wouldn't be safe anywhere at all. But Uran will protect you and get you meat. He is very intelligent cat and furiously loyal to us."
"Looks like I have no choises, but to submit."
"I don't want you to submit. I want you to do this willingly, or not at all."
Alesha thought about her situation. She had absolutely nowhere to go, she had a cabin here and she loved her daughter. How could she refuse? And in addition to that all she had fell in love to Dor. She also realized he had to be very well aware of other's thoughts.
"I bet you know exactly why I have no choises."
"I trust she'll be taken good care of."
Dor took several packages of food from his sack and five bottles of honeywine, most wanted drink in all North. Night was slowly covering the lands.
"Are you leaving so soon, at this hour?"
"I thought you and baby need to get some sleep."
"I hoped you'd stay for a while..." She definitely didn't want this man - or better said much greater being - to leave. She wanted feel him, touch him, love him.
"I can stay for the night at least. It will be nice change from every day responsibilities."
She didn't believe her ears: Might had responsibilities? What responsibilities he might have? Couldn't he just... No, of course nothing worked so easily. He had to make decisions, think things thoroughly and take care of lot of things.
In the end, Dor spent four nights with her. Four nights she wouldn't ever forget. Nights she'd never trade for anything.
After Dor's departure life continued as normal as it could in their isolated haven. Tai grew very slowly, but now Alesha was sure everything was fine. Uran brought plenty of prey to them and in the end Alesha began to almost enjoy her life. By autumn she had her cabin filled with hides and salted meat. She didn't even know what she would do with all of it. At least Uran didn't need food for winter, his snow-white fur and superb hunting skills guaranteed his survival.
It was quite funny, actually, to pet beast three or four times her weight. He was also quite playful, but never threatened Tai Cara's or her health. If Alesha wasn't carrying Tai Cara, he might even jump on her, pushing her over to the river. One more proof he wasn't going to hurt her in any way, not even by accident. Hard ground was far more dangerous to fall on than water.
Winter was over soon, it was far easier than last two had been. Spring and summer went by and they didn't even hear of anyone. Tai Cara was clearly growing, but slowly. They didn't hear a word from Dor. Of course he was occupied with war and everything. Dor had told her that decisive battles were delayed by year or two, because preparations took more time than he had anticipated. Also lemenians had encountered serious problems after initial victories. Their offensive had stalled soon after first land gains to difficulties in maintenance. Lack of roads and difficult terrain were far worse hindrance they had believed.
She managed to find a find a spot where a rare plant called witchblade grew. It had relaxing and euphoric effect when it's leaves were smoked and usually witches demanded them all to their own use. It could also be used to spice up food, but it was too rare and too tasteless for that. Alesha gathered a small stock of it's leaves and succeeded making a primitive pipe. Then she began to greet full moon with a pipe and a chalice of honeywine. And only then she used them.
Another winter and another year. Time flew by, but she wasn't actually complaining. She had everything she needed but company. Uran was of some company, but it wasn't the same, she wanted to hear talk and began waiting for when Tai would learn to speak. And when she was only three years old, looking still like a year and a half or so old, she spoke. Not too well yet, but well enough they could talk a little.
Edit: Oops, couple of stupid typos fixed. Thanks to Frodo for pointing them out. Sorry for small ones, I'm not going to go hunting them.
...70 years... LOL
#95
Frodo
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- Admin
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- 9533 posts
Your neck looks very... tasty!
Posted 08 July 2007 - 01:11 PM
It was interesting seeing her slowly getting used to her new life with Tai Cara. And then finally meeting the Prescence (Dor) was amazing. He was this powerful being, yet he was so kind and gentle. He came to make sure she and Tai Cara were okay, then stayed for 4 nights.
And I loved seeing her build up a relationship with Uran. He looked out for her, and would not hurt her under any circumstance. He was a big, playful, fluffy giant.
I like how you make it clear that a long time has passed - 'Spring came and snow melted away' etc. I can see them so clearly in my head. I can imagine Alesha & Tai Cara sitting there, with Uran guarding them.
Brilliant work.
And I loved seeing her build up a relationship with Uran. He looked out for her, and would not hurt her under any circumstance. He was a big, playful, fluffy giant.
I like how you make it clear that a long time has passed - 'Spring came and snow melted away' etc. I can see them so clearly in my head. I can imagine Alesha & Tai Cara sitting there, with Uran guarding them.
Brilliant work.
Please click on my dragons to help them grow -
#96
Juni Ori
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- Members
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- 4277 posts
Gaming Guru
Posted 08 July 2007 - 06:01 PM
STORY OF TAI CARA - PART 4
Somehow I don't feel this was as succesful as first two, even worse than third. I think I may be taking a short pause trying to find inspiration.
Well, normal thanks and everything. bbl.
Edit: Many typos and stupid he/she errors fixed, thanks to Frodo! She has helped me a lot in writing this! Full respect.
Quote
Year after year passed and Dor didn't return. They remained in isolation and heard nothing from outside world. Uran had grown even more weight and he apparently had some sort of mate living nearby, because every now and then they roared to each other. Often Uran left soon after the roaring for a day or so, but not until eleventh winter Alesha's suspicions got confirmation: Uran carried small whelp in his mouth.
Tai Cara, who clearly loved Uran, was excited of newcomer. She had used Uran as a mount when she tired badly, which happened very rarely, but now she had someone to play with. She had grown slowly, and looked like six or seven years old, but her mind was of her real age. It was odd, but except for her constant nightmares, there was nothing really wrong with her.
Whelp, whom they began to call Reana after Alesha's sister, was playful and not even closely as careful as Uran. She clawed them both, sometimes even badly, but really serious injuries were avoided. With Uran she was even rougher and once Alesha even intervened and took care of Uran's wounds as best as she could. By spring Reana had grown and grown significantly. When Uran brought her, she was only few kilos heavy, but now she was twice or three times heavier.
Then the isolation ended.
At one early morning Reana, who slept upstairs, inside the cabin or at the balcony, roared as only whelp could. Alesha woke up and saw Tai Cara awake, perhaps Reana had woken her too. She saw Reana standing in the balcony, staring at the woods. She rushed to the balcony and saw Uran leaping over the river. Something was definitely approaching, and even though Reana hadn't even began training hunting seriously, she separated prey and possible threat. Uran's deep roar from nearby woods confirmed her suspicions.
"Alesha?" distant man's voice called.
Somebody was looking at her and it definitely wasn't lemen's high voice. Maybe he was Dor's messenger.
"Uran! Come back!" she shouted and took her axe. "Tai, keep Reana inside."
"But mom, I can help you."
"I know you can, but now is not the time."
"But mom..."
"Shut up! And stay inside!"
Uran came back to river and leaped over it, watching behind most of the time.
"Alesha?" voice called again.
"Here!" she answered, glancing behind to check that Tai really obeyed her.
It took few moments and some calls before badly worn man reached the river. He carried a sword unsheathed and his torn clothes were covered in blood. He was in very bad condition and he fell into the river exhausted. Alesha rushed down to help him. Uran didn't let her close the man before he had pushed it several times and turned him over, so he wouldn't drown.
"He dropped his sword! Let him be and let me help him!" Alesha shouted soon and slapped Uran hard to behind. Uran watched him with a stunning, surprised expression on his face. He was like he'd never believed Alesha dared to actually try to hurt him in any way! And he seemed to step aside mostly for being confused.
Quick study revealed her that man's wounds were serious, but most of the minor ones had healed pretty well. Worst wounds had inflamed and blood loss was clearly significant. Man had lost significantly weight and he was deadly pale.
"Alesha..." man whispered. "The sword..."
"I'll get it, but now I take care of you."
"No, I must fulfill my mission..." man insisted. "We lost the battle... Our ranks wavered and finally broke... Soon there were only Dor, his bannerbearer Beludor, his weaponsmith Andor and me... He gave us all missions and sent us away... My mission was to bring Tai Cara this sword..." man said searching the sword from the bottom of the river with his right hand.
"The sword is right here," Alesha replied picking the sword from the water and raising it so man could see it.
"Dor ordered me to tell Tai Cara must find a spouse worth a dynasty, who'll wield this sword in battle and..." violent coughing interrupted man's speech. He fell unconscious into Alesha's arms.
Alesha dragged him to her island and realized she could never get man up to the cabin without help. She raised her eyes up and saw Tai Cara. She could lower a rope they used to lift heavy burdens up and perhaps they together had enough strength to pull man up.
In the end they made it, but the man didn't. He was dead when they got him up. Alesha's desperate cry and frustrated rage didn't help at all, man was dead.
After unadorned funerals life continued in a sadder mood. Both Alesha and Tai Cara were sure Dor had fallen in combat. Tai could comfort her mother by telling her that part of him lived still with them in them both, but especially in Tai. Still so many questions were left open: who was this man who had brought them the message partly and the sword? What was Dor's message in whole? They had no way of knowing.
Before they even noticed, time had passed to autumn and they encountered new difficulties: whelp became very sick and they feared they'd lose her. She was losing her baby teeth and had very high fever. Tai was even more afraid than her mother.
"Mom, isn't there anything we can do to help her?"
"You're the one of us who knows better what's wrong with her and you're the one who seems to know herbs better, can't you come up with something? I've used all my skills."
Tai spent nearly ten days trying to cure her whelp, but nothing helped. In the end she died.
"Tai, that's nature, you can't help it. Tine created all life, but like everything, it eventually ends. Now was this whelp's time to go back to her arms."
Sobbing Tai ran out and across the river into the woods. Uran sprang after her and Alesha watched long after them and carried Reana's lifeless body down and placed her next to messenger's grave. She sat there waiting Tai's return, so she could bury her pet. But night came and Tai Cara did not return. In the end Alesha decided to bury Reana. Corpse would invite vultures and she didn't like the idea, nor she believed Tai would like it.
It took four days and four nights before Tai finally came back. After that they never again spoke of Reana. At the very next spring Uran brought another whelp. It was male, but otherwise just like Reana had been. Life returned to their small realm and this whelp they didn't lose. He survived from losing his baby teeth and getting new ones. Tai apparently forgot losing Reana.
After some consideration they decided to name the new whelp as Beludor because Tai had tied a red scarf around his neck, and so he would be her bannerbearer, just like Beludor had beared Dor's red-based banner in the battlefield. Ever since red was Tai's favorite, almost sacred color.
Uran and Beludor took turns in guard and Udor clearly became lazier. Even though he did hunt and teach his whelp to hunt, most of his freetime he just laid in the sun or sheltering from the rain under the tree. He didn't ambush Alesha and Tai Cara anymore, but was satisfied to watch Beludor playing with them. Every now and then Beludor challenged Uran and was bested without any chances.
Uran had become massive, frightening sight. His scarred fur and especially face must had been very scary to those outside his pack, that being everybody else but Alesha, Tai Cara and Beludor. The tip of his mane had gradually turned bright yellow, reminding Alesha of a crown. He was definitely a guardian of worth for the queens.
Tai Cara was already nineteen years old, though she looked like only twelve or so, when at spring they noticed wildlife fleeing and soon they heard terrifying barking from distance. Tai was on the ground with now full-grown Beludor and she quickly commanded him up. Uran was on a hunting trip, hopefully able to take care of himself. Alesha ran to the balcony armed with an axe and helped her daughter up.
"What is that?" Tai asked a slight hint of fear in her voice.
"I don't know, but it doesn't promise any good. You notice how the woods are silent? I guess animals ran away, perhaps we should've ran too."
"No, I don't believe so. Listen, it's barking. Wolves and dogs can't climb trees."
"Where's Uran?"
"Hunting somewhere, hopefully coming home."
"He should be, Dor ordered him to protect us."
"Beludor is more than willing to fight."
"I know, don't let him go down, better if he's up here with us."
The voices closed in from the north. Alesha knew too well that Uran used to make hunting trips to south, so he could watch out for lemens. Hopefully he wasn't chasing a prey too concentrated, so he'd hear the voices. She handed over another axe to Tai, whose eyes were burning. Alesha had seen that fire in Tai's eyes before, mostly when she was angry.
"Uran! Here boy!" Tai shouted.
"Come on! Quick!"
Beast was in mid-air acrossing the river and landed growling. Voices came closer and closer. Then they heard branches cracking, bushes rustling and small feet thudding the ground. All of the sudden forest exploded into life and dozens of creatures, reminding a mix of wolves and rats, charged towards them. Uran roared louder than ever again and sheer force of the voice halted the incoming creatures.
"Uran! Here boy! Climb up!" Alesha tried to call him half-panicked, but lion breathed deeply, staring halted ranks of the creatures, which of nearest were standing in the river. They stood on their back feet. Alesha remembered vaguely stories from his youth.
"Uran, here!" Tai tried, but in vain.
Another roar and the ranks wavered back. Perhaps they had encountered snowlions before and knew them very dangerous foes. All of the sudden Tai Cara realized few of the creatures carried crude spears! And they were communicating!
"Scree, scree, scree!" they screeched each other. It was like some very primitive language.
One of them threw its spear. Uran dodged it and roared. Stronger than other screech, almost like a roar, silenced others and creatures made way. Something larger was coming from the woods. Uran glanced to his both flanks, where the creatures had to spread, and prepared to confront whatever it was coming from the woods.
Larger creature, taller than Alesha, while others were only to her waist or so, stepped out of the woods. Creature and Uran stared at each other. Low growling pitched higher, when the large creature joined Uran's growl. Tai Cara realized, that smaller ones were slowly encircling Uran and definitely not fighting fairly. She touched her mothers hand who seemed to guess her thoughts and took a firm grip from her wrist.
"You are not going down there!"
"But they'll kill him!"
"Perhaps, but if I know him at all, he'll kill huge numbers of them before that. He is our guardian with a holy responsibility, not just a pet or a friend. And you keep Beludor up here, he is Uran's successor, if he falls."
Tai Cara bit her lip and glanced around. She saw her mother's javelin and grabbed it, threw it with force and hit the large creature in the leg. Uran didn't waste time. Before anyone even realized still white beast was in the air, landing perfectly on his opponents shoulders. Deep claws tore deep and teeth were close of reaching throat. Creatures hurried forward, but they were clearly late. Front paws rose in to the air one at a time and struck down, causing massive showers of blood to raise into the air.
Dozens of creatures attacked and Uran turned violently shaking himself, trying to get rid of unwanted passengers, that were clawing and biting him. Beludor tore himself free and landed into middle of the enemy, crushing at least three under him. Both lions stood up and swung creatures into all directions, but took hits all the time. Tears rose to Tai Cara's eyes, she had to be down there helping her only friends!
"Stay here!" Alesha shouted and grabbed the rope, sliding down into the battle.
Tai Cara didn't wait a second, but followed her mother. In the middle of suddenly reduced numbers of enemies, they strenghtened their side decisively. Only every tenth or so creature got away from the battle. Both lions were in fact red, not white anymore. Luckily their winter fur would soon fall off, they didn't need to wash them necessarily.
After a short while, realizing somewhere behind her mind she was in big trouble, Tai Cara saw images of the battle in his mind. Her rage had discharged in fiery bursts via her hands and her axe. She realized she was unhurt, unlike her mother, who had suffered several minor wounds. The other three were staring at her. She wasn't sure what had happened, but she had felt the same power before deep inside her. She also realized she was exhausted. She fainted.
"Good morning, dear, did you sleep well?" she recognized her mother's voice. She felt like she had lied still forever.
"How long did I sleep?"
"You've been in the bed for six days, but don't you remember waking up few times?"
"No..."
Then she did remember. She had vague pictures of lions resting in the cabin, both looking ill and weak. She startled.
"How are..."
"They are fine, better than you now. Though you were only sleeping, they were ill. And so was I, but thanks to knowledge you've passed to me, I was able to cure us. I also scouted the close regions and noticed, that most of them passed us. Only those, who happened to pass our island attacked us."
"Oh, okay..."
"Can you explain what happened in that battle?"
"Hmm... No, not actually..."
"Your arms and axe were in flames, that actually burned those creatures, but not you."
"I remember..."
"And you don't know what happened?"
"No... But I think I know how I could do it again."
"I don't think it's very good idea. I've had time to think and I guess that was the reason you needed that much rest."
Tai Cara thought about it. Possibly. Well, that wouldn't be big surprise, she was able to summon fire - or something like it. It had to be straining. It wasn't quite fire, it was hotter and even still it hadn't burned her. And she had burned her fingers many times in youth. All of the sudden she thought the Sun. And the Sun was one of the strongest Mights there was. And it was similar to fire, however far more brighter... and hotter, because it warmed from so far away...
Friendly and familiar roar greeted her before Beludor sprang in. He pushed Tai over and pushed her with his massive head. She was almost suffocated into his mane. Then her face was washed with a rough tongue. After Beludor's expression of love she continued her thoughts.
Finally she seemed full-grown in age of twenty-six. Her mother had aged and became weaker and more tired. She was still energetic at days, but at the evenings Tai could see she had been crying. She sat in the balcony watching the moon or horizon smoking her pipe and drinking mead she had made herself. Tai didn't ever dare to disturb her and even the lions leaved her be. One morning her mother had apparently stood up all night on the balcony.
"Dear, I've thought long and carefully and I think it's your time to go searching husband, man of worth throne of adors, man of worth you. You should take this sword and give it to him, when you find him. That was your father's will, though we don't know all of it. But please leave Uran to keep me company..."
"Don't talk that way, you can come with me!"
"I don't believe it is good idea. I've had a long and good life. I've had my share of adventures and excitement. You need to learn to live on your own."
"I know how to live on my own, but I don't want to!"
"I understand, but as I did, you have to carry your burden and fulfill your destiny your father has set for you. It was his last will."
"But he didn't demand me to do it alone!"
"No, but do you ask me to share your burden after all of my own? No, I'm not accompany you. You have to find your path alone with Beludor. Isn't it suitable moment for me and Uran to retire and enjoy our last few years here?"
Tai was crying, she didn't want to leave her mother here alone to die. Not even with Uran, who'd surely be ferociously loyal to her. Perhaps she just had no choise. Her mother would never forgive, if she didn't go and start seeking her own destiny. Maybe it was proper that her mother could live her last years in peace here. After heartbreaking goodbyes and lots of tears she left the next morning with Beludor. Also the lions seemed to know the departure was final and they seemed to fare each other well in their own way.
Tai Cara, who clearly loved Uran, was excited of newcomer. She had used Uran as a mount when she tired badly, which happened very rarely, but now she had someone to play with. She had grown slowly, and looked like six or seven years old, but her mind was of her real age. It was odd, but except for her constant nightmares, there was nothing really wrong with her.
Whelp, whom they began to call Reana after Alesha's sister, was playful and not even closely as careful as Uran. She clawed them both, sometimes even badly, but really serious injuries were avoided. With Uran she was even rougher and once Alesha even intervened and took care of Uran's wounds as best as she could. By spring Reana had grown and grown significantly. When Uran brought her, she was only few kilos heavy, but now she was twice or three times heavier.
Then the isolation ended.
At one early morning Reana, who slept upstairs, inside the cabin or at the balcony, roared as only whelp could. Alesha woke up and saw Tai Cara awake, perhaps Reana had woken her too. She saw Reana standing in the balcony, staring at the woods. She rushed to the balcony and saw Uran leaping over the river. Something was definitely approaching, and even though Reana hadn't even began training hunting seriously, she separated prey and possible threat. Uran's deep roar from nearby woods confirmed her suspicions.
"Alesha?" distant man's voice called.
Somebody was looking at her and it definitely wasn't lemen's high voice. Maybe he was Dor's messenger.
"Uran! Come back!" she shouted and took her axe. "Tai, keep Reana inside."
"But mom, I can help you."
"I know you can, but now is not the time."
"But mom..."
"Shut up! And stay inside!"
Uran came back to river and leaped over it, watching behind most of the time.
"Alesha?" voice called again.
"Here!" she answered, glancing behind to check that Tai really obeyed her.
It took few moments and some calls before badly worn man reached the river. He carried a sword unsheathed and his torn clothes were covered in blood. He was in very bad condition and he fell into the river exhausted. Alesha rushed down to help him. Uran didn't let her close the man before he had pushed it several times and turned him over, so he wouldn't drown.
"He dropped his sword! Let him be and let me help him!" Alesha shouted soon and slapped Uran hard to behind. Uran watched him with a stunning, surprised expression on his face. He was like he'd never believed Alesha dared to actually try to hurt him in any way! And he seemed to step aside mostly for being confused.
Quick study revealed her that man's wounds were serious, but most of the minor ones had healed pretty well. Worst wounds had inflamed and blood loss was clearly significant. Man had lost significantly weight and he was deadly pale.
"Alesha..." man whispered. "The sword..."
"I'll get it, but now I take care of you."
"No, I must fulfill my mission..." man insisted. "We lost the battle... Our ranks wavered and finally broke... Soon there were only Dor, his bannerbearer Beludor, his weaponsmith Andor and me... He gave us all missions and sent us away... My mission was to bring Tai Cara this sword..." man said searching the sword from the bottom of the river with his right hand.
"The sword is right here," Alesha replied picking the sword from the water and raising it so man could see it.
"Dor ordered me to tell Tai Cara must find a spouse worth a dynasty, who'll wield this sword in battle and..." violent coughing interrupted man's speech. He fell unconscious into Alesha's arms.
Alesha dragged him to her island and realized she could never get man up to the cabin without help. She raised her eyes up and saw Tai Cara. She could lower a rope they used to lift heavy burdens up and perhaps they together had enough strength to pull man up.
In the end they made it, but the man didn't. He was dead when they got him up. Alesha's desperate cry and frustrated rage didn't help at all, man was dead.
After unadorned funerals life continued in a sadder mood. Both Alesha and Tai Cara were sure Dor had fallen in combat. Tai could comfort her mother by telling her that part of him lived still with them in them both, but especially in Tai. Still so many questions were left open: who was this man who had brought them the message partly and the sword? What was Dor's message in whole? They had no way of knowing.
Before they even noticed, time had passed to autumn and they encountered new difficulties: whelp became very sick and they feared they'd lose her. She was losing her baby teeth and had very high fever. Tai was even more afraid than her mother.
"Mom, isn't there anything we can do to help her?"
"You're the one of us who knows better what's wrong with her and you're the one who seems to know herbs better, can't you come up with something? I've used all my skills."
Tai spent nearly ten days trying to cure her whelp, but nothing helped. In the end she died.
"Tai, that's nature, you can't help it. Tine created all life, but like everything, it eventually ends. Now was this whelp's time to go back to her arms."
Sobbing Tai ran out and across the river into the woods. Uran sprang after her and Alesha watched long after them and carried Reana's lifeless body down and placed her next to messenger's grave. She sat there waiting Tai's return, so she could bury her pet. But night came and Tai Cara did not return. In the end Alesha decided to bury Reana. Corpse would invite vultures and she didn't like the idea, nor she believed Tai would like it.
It took four days and four nights before Tai finally came back. After that they never again spoke of Reana. At the very next spring Uran brought another whelp. It was male, but otherwise just like Reana had been. Life returned to their small realm and this whelp they didn't lose. He survived from losing his baby teeth and getting new ones. Tai apparently forgot losing Reana.
After some consideration they decided to name the new whelp as Beludor because Tai had tied a red scarf around his neck, and so he would be her bannerbearer, just like Beludor had beared Dor's red-based banner in the battlefield. Ever since red was Tai's favorite, almost sacred color.
Uran and Beludor took turns in guard and Udor clearly became lazier. Even though he did hunt and teach his whelp to hunt, most of his freetime he just laid in the sun or sheltering from the rain under the tree. He didn't ambush Alesha and Tai Cara anymore, but was satisfied to watch Beludor playing with them. Every now and then Beludor challenged Uran and was bested without any chances.
Uran had become massive, frightening sight. His scarred fur and especially face must had been very scary to those outside his pack, that being everybody else but Alesha, Tai Cara and Beludor. The tip of his mane had gradually turned bright yellow, reminding Alesha of a crown. He was definitely a guardian of worth for the queens.
Tai Cara was already nineteen years old, though she looked like only twelve or so, when at spring they noticed wildlife fleeing and soon they heard terrifying barking from distance. Tai was on the ground with now full-grown Beludor and she quickly commanded him up. Uran was on a hunting trip, hopefully able to take care of himself. Alesha ran to the balcony armed with an axe and helped her daughter up.
"What is that?" Tai asked a slight hint of fear in her voice.
"I don't know, but it doesn't promise any good. You notice how the woods are silent? I guess animals ran away, perhaps we should've ran too."
"No, I don't believe so. Listen, it's barking. Wolves and dogs can't climb trees."
"Where's Uran?"
"Hunting somewhere, hopefully coming home."
"He should be, Dor ordered him to protect us."
"Beludor is more than willing to fight."
"I know, don't let him go down, better if he's up here with us."
The voices closed in from the north. Alesha knew too well that Uran used to make hunting trips to south, so he could watch out for lemens. Hopefully he wasn't chasing a prey too concentrated, so he'd hear the voices. She handed over another axe to Tai, whose eyes were burning. Alesha had seen that fire in Tai's eyes before, mostly when she was angry.
"Uran! Here boy!" Tai shouted.
"Come on! Quick!"
Beast was in mid-air acrossing the river and landed growling. Voices came closer and closer. Then they heard branches cracking, bushes rustling and small feet thudding the ground. All of the sudden forest exploded into life and dozens of creatures, reminding a mix of wolves and rats, charged towards them. Uran roared louder than ever again and sheer force of the voice halted the incoming creatures.
"Uran! Here boy! Climb up!" Alesha tried to call him half-panicked, but lion breathed deeply, staring halted ranks of the creatures, which of nearest were standing in the river. They stood on their back feet. Alesha remembered vaguely stories from his youth.
"Uran, here!" Tai tried, but in vain.
Another roar and the ranks wavered back. Perhaps they had encountered snowlions before and knew them very dangerous foes. All of the sudden Tai Cara realized few of the creatures carried crude spears! And they were communicating!
"Scree, scree, scree!" they screeched each other. It was like some very primitive language.
One of them threw its spear. Uran dodged it and roared. Stronger than other screech, almost like a roar, silenced others and creatures made way. Something larger was coming from the woods. Uran glanced to his both flanks, where the creatures had to spread, and prepared to confront whatever it was coming from the woods.
Larger creature, taller than Alesha, while others were only to her waist or so, stepped out of the woods. Creature and Uran stared at each other. Low growling pitched higher, when the large creature joined Uran's growl. Tai Cara realized, that smaller ones were slowly encircling Uran and definitely not fighting fairly. She touched her mothers hand who seemed to guess her thoughts and took a firm grip from her wrist.
"You are not going down there!"
"But they'll kill him!"
"Perhaps, but if I know him at all, he'll kill huge numbers of them before that. He is our guardian with a holy responsibility, not just a pet or a friend. And you keep Beludor up here, he is Uran's successor, if he falls."
Tai Cara bit her lip and glanced around. She saw her mother's javelin and grabbed it, threw it with force and hit the large creature in the leg. Uran didn't waste time. Before anyone even realized still white beast was in the air, landing perfectly on his opponents shoulders. Deep claws tore deep and teeth were close of reaching throat. Creatures hurried forward, but they were clearly late. Front paws rose in to the air one at a time and struck down, causing massive showers of blood to raise into the air.
Dozens of creatures attacked and Uran turned violently shaking himself, trying to get rid of unwanted passengers, that were clawing and biting him. Beludor tore himself free and landed into middle of the enemy, crushing at least three under him. Both lions stood up and swung creatures into all directions, but took hits all the time. Tears rose to Tai Cara's eyes, she had to be down there helping her only friends!
"Stay here!" Alesha shouted and grabbed the rope, sliding down into the battle.
Tai Cara didn't wait a second, but followed her mother. In the middle of suddenly reduced numbers of enemies, they strenghtened their side decisively. Only every tenth or so creature got away from the battle. Both lions were in fact red, not white anymore. Luckily their winter fur would soon fall off, they didn't need to wash them necessarily.
After a short while, realizing somewhere behind her mind she was in big trouble, Tai Cara saw images of the battle in his mind. Her rage had discharged in fiery bursts via her hands and her axe. She realized she was unhurt, unlike her mother, who had suffered several minor wounds. The other three were staring at her. She wasn't sure what had happened, but she had felt the same power before deep inside her. She also realized she was exhausted. She fainted.
"Good morning, dear, did you sleep well?" she recognized her mother's voice. She felt like she had lied still forever.
"How long did I sleep?"
"You've been in the bed for six days, but don't you remember waking up few times?"
"No..."
Then she did remember. She had vague pictures of lions resting in the cabin, both looking ill and weak. She startled.
"How are..."
"They are fine, better than you now. Though you were only sleeping, they were ill. And so was I, but thanks to knowledge you've passed to me, I was able to cure us. I also scouted the close regions and noticed, that most of them passed us. Only those, who happened to pass our island attacked us."
"Oh, okay..."
"Can you explain what happened in that battle?"
"Hmm... No, not actually..."
"Your arms and axe were in flames, that actually burned those creatures, but not you."
"I remember..."
"And you don't know what happened?"
"No... But I think I know how I could do it again."
"I don't think it's very good idea. I've had time to think and I guess that was the reason you needed that much rest."
Tai Cara thought about it. Possibly. Well, that wouldn't be big surprise, she was able to summon fire - or something like it. It had to be straining. It wasn't quite fire, it was hotter and even still it hadn't burned her. And she had burned her fingers many times in youth. All of the sudden she thought the Sun. And the Sun was one of the strongest Mights there was. And it was similar to fire, however far more brighter... and hotter, because it warmed from so far away...
Friendly and familiar roar greeted her before Beludor sprang in. He pushed Tai over and pushed her with his massive head. She was almost suffocated into his mane. Then her face was washed with a rough tongue. After Beludor's expression of love she continued her thoughts.
Finally she seemed full-grown in age of twenty-six. Her mother had aged and became weaker and more tired. She was still energetic at days, but at the evenings Tai could see she had been crying. She sat in the balcony watching the moon or horizon smoking her pipe and drinking mead she had made herself. Tai didn't ever dare to disturb her and even the lions leaved her be. One morning her mother had apparently stood up all night on the balcony.
"Dear, I've thought long and carefully and I think it's your time to go searching husband, man of worth throne of adors, man of worth you. You should take this sword and give it to him, when you find him. That was your father's will, though we don't know all of it. But please leave Uran to keep me company..."
"Don't talk that way, you can come with me!"
"I don't believe it is good idea. I've had a long and good life. I've had my share of adventures and excitement. You need to learn to live on your own."
"I know how to live on my own, but I don't want to!"
"I understand, but as I did, you have to carry your burden and fulfill your destiny your father has set for you. It was his last will."
"But he didn't demand me to do it alone!"
"No, but do you ask me to share your burden after all of my own? No, I'm not accompany you. You have to find your path alone with Beludor. Isn't it suitable moment for me and Uran to retire and enjoy our last few years here?"
Tai was crying, she didn't want to leave her mother here alone to die. Not even with Uran, who'd surely be ferociously loyal to her. Perhaps she just had no choise. Her mother would never forgive, if she didn't go and start seeking her own destiny. Maybe it was proper that her mother could live her last years in peace here. After heartbreaking goodbyes and lots of tears she left the next morning with Beludor. Also the lions seemed to know the departure was final and they seemed to fare each other well in their own way.
Well, normal thanks and everything. bbl.
Edit: Many typos and stupid he/she errors fixed, thanks to Frodo! She has helped me a lot in writing this! Full respect.
...70 years... LOL
#97
Frodo
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Your neck looks very... tasty!
Posted 08 July 2007 - 06:49 PM
I was really anxious for Uran - especially when the creatures were surrounding him. My heart skipped a few beats when both lions were red (from blood). That was one INTENSE battle. 
Tai's new-found power of summoning fire was a nice touch, even though it exhausted her.
Sad when she and Beludor have to leave at the end, so she can find a husband.
Tai's new-found power of summoning fire was a nice touch, even though it exhausted her.
Sad when she and Beludor have to leave at the end, so she can find a husband.
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#98
greywolf
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Posted 08 July 2007 - 10:41 PM
Ah, this is all good stuff. You've got excellent descriptions of what's going on, good character development and dialog. I like how you've gotten inside of Alesha's head and described what she's feeling - that makes it easy to relate to her. I've only got a couple of questions and suggestions. Just take what I say with a grain of salt, because I don't actually know the setting as well as you do and thus I may be missing some things. 
I don't really know why this (bolded) part is in here; it really kind of smacks of political correctness, to tell you the truth. I can see how you'd want to explain more of the culture, but this part doesn't really fit; anyone knows that people don't act normal when angry, so you don't need to go out of your way (and break the tone/mood in the process) by over explaining things.
I find it somewhat hard to believe that a demigod of sorts doesn't know what's supposed to happen when a Might and normal (?) human have a child together, and especially that this sort of thing has never happened before (and thus no precedent has been set for this sort of thing).
I also find it hard to believe that a woman that was (presumably) in love with her husband would instantly fall deeply in love with someone that (indirectly) killed her husband. Even if you removed the husband factor from the situation (which may be plausible, although it seems to me that she did love him, even if he did have anger issues), no one really "falls in love" with someone over a matter of a few hours. Then again, it's possible that Mights might (pun intended) have some sort of special charismatic ability that makes them very attractive, and I'm just missing that.
Again, excellent work. I'll be looking forward to see where Tai Cara's journey takes her next!
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Witch tried to calm him down, but he just pushed her aside, which was in normal conditions a serious crime.
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"Do you know why my pregnancy took so long and why she is growing so slowly?" Alesha dared to ask.
"I don't know exactly, but I believe it's normal. She may be growing slow, but she will become strong and powerful."
"I don't know exactly, but I believe it's normal. She may be growing slow, but she will become strong and powerful."
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Alesha found it unbelieveable that she was talking to a Might so casually, even though of very legendary issues. His presence was very comfortable and she realized she had fell in love. In very deep love.
Again, excellent work. I'll be looking forward to see where Tai Cara's journey takes her next!
#99
Juni Ori
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Posted 08 July 2007 - 11:42 PM
Hmm... Interesting points you dug up. Okay, first I admit as such, though I must say I wanted to underline the witch's special position. A mistake, perhaps.
Now you used that demi-god term - that I not-too-willingly mentioned in msn - in just the way I was afraid of. Does the "divinity" - in this case known as Might - have to omniscient? A question that has as diverse answers as there are religions. Many different polytheist religions have myths where gods are not omniscient and their ignorance is used for profit. Taken into consideration that the Sun and the World they (btw, not humans, but very humane) live in are Greater Mights, Dor's significance and thus knowledge can be assumed very limited. And - this part I love - who says he is talking the truth? Okay, admitted I couldn't figure out a single reason why he would lie in that position, but how does that old christian phrase goes? Mysterious are... Can't remember it.
Third part. It seems I have failed miserably. Alesha was supposed to be very miserable in her marriage, feeling very little if any love towards her husband, their marriage was political. She lusted for love and physical contact yes, but under those circumstances she had no other choises but to hope getting them from her husband. And yes, Mights can be extremely charismatic or horrific as they please. However here I've wanted to limit their superiority also, but you'll find it out later.
After all that you call it excellent? Well, I thank you, but as I've mentioned before, I'm not perfectly happy myself. Tai Cara's journey will continue, thank you for all feedbacks I've had here and in msn.
Edit: I forgot to mention special thanks I found very pleasing: getting inside the Alesha's head. As most of you may guess, the perspective will now change to Tai's.
Now you used that demi-god term - that I not-too-willingly mentioned in msn - in just the way I was afraid of. Does the "divinity" - in this case known as Might - have to omniscient? A question that has as diverse answers as there are religions. Many different polytheist religions have myths where gods are not omniscient and their ignorance is used for profit. Taken into consideration that the Sun and the World they (btw, not humans, but very humane) live in are Greater Mights, Dor's significance and thus knowledge can be assumed very limited. And - this part I love - who says he is talking the truth? Okay, admitted I couldn't figure out a single reason why he would lie in that position, but how does that old christian phrase goes? Mysterious are... Can't remember it.
Third part. It seems I have failed miserably. Alesha was supposed to be very miserable in her marriage, feeling very little if any love towards her husband, their marriage was political. She lusted for love and physical contact yes, but under those circumstances she had no other choises but to hope getting them from her husband. And yes, Mights can be extremely charismatic or horrific as they please. However here I've wanted to limit their superiority also, but you'll find it out later.
After all that you call it excellent? Well, I thank you, but as I've mentioned before, I'm not perfectly happy myself. Tai Cara's journey will continue, thank you for all feedbacks I've had here and in msn.
Edit: I forgot to mention special thanks I found very pleasing: getting inside the Alesha's head. As most of you may guess, the perspective will now change to Tai's.
...70 years... LOL
#100
Frodo
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Your neck looks very... tasty!
Posted 09 July 2007 - 01:26 AM
Wolfie, I thought the child grew slowly, cos this is no ordinary child. She has great power inside her.
And it seemed to me like there was nothing between her and her husband. She longed to be free of him. The snowlion rescued her from his wrath, when he caught up with her in the snow.
And it seemed to me like there was nothing between her and her husband. She longed to be free of him. The snowlion rescued her from his wrath, when he caught up with her in the snow.
Please click on my dragons to help them grow -
#101
greywolf
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Posted 09 July 2007 - 01:30 AM
Juni Ori, on Jul 8 2007, 05:42 PM, said:
Hmm... Interesting points you dug up. Okay, first I admit as such, though I must say I wanted to underline the witch's special position. A mistake, perhaps.
Juni Ori, on Jul 8 2007, 05:42 PM, said:
Now you used that demi-god term - that I not-too-willingly mentioned in msn - in just the way I was afraid of. Does the "divinity" - in this case known as Might - have to omniscient? A question that has as diverse answers as there are religions. Many different polytheist religions have myths where gods are not omniscient and their ignorance is used for profit. Taken into consideration that the Sun and the World they (btw, not humans, but very humane) live in are Greater Mights, Dor's significance and thus knowledge can be assumed very limited. And - this part I love - who says he is talking the truth? Okay, admitted I couldn't figure out a single reason why he would lie in that position, but how does that old christian phrase goes? Mysterious are... Can't remember it.
I see what you're trying to do here, and it could really turn into a major theme for your book (if you're into that kind of thing). Exploring the idea of a being gifted with great power yet not being omniscient and even struggling with acceptance of that power and what to do with it is something you could really use when you get inside Tai Cara's head.Juni Ori, on Jul 8 2007, 05:42 PM, said:
Third part. It seems I have failed miserably. Alesha was supposed to be very miserable in her marriage, feeling very little if any love towards her husband, their marriage was political. She lusted for love and physical contact yes, but under those circumstances she had no other choises but to hope getting them from her husband. And yes, Mights can be extremely charismatic or horrific as they please. However here I've wanted to limit their superiority also, but you'll find it out later.
Ah, I don't think you've failed - it's just that you didn't write enough.
If you provided more explanation for what was going on and for Alesha's motivations and feelings (of which you've already done a good job), then I think I would have understood that. Juni Ori, on Jul 8 2007, 05:42 PM, said:
After all that you call it excellent? Well, I thank you, but as I've mentioned before, I'm not perfectly happy myself. Tai Cara's journey will continue, thank you for all feedbacks I've had here and in msn.
Edit: I forgot to mention special thanks I found very pleasing: getting inside the Alesha's head. As most of you may guess, the perspective will now change to Tai's.
Edit: I forgot to mention special thanks I found very pleasing: getting inside the Alesha's head. As most of you may guess, the perspective will now change to Tai's.
Your book's a work in progress - all you really need to do is have the drive to finish it and then go back and fix all the broken parts. You've got some really good ideas bouncing around in there, so keep it up!
#102
Juni Ori
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Posted 09 July 2007 - 01:39 AM
That was exactly the quote I was looking for. That theme is kind of what I'm doing in this side-project and I'm honestly just toying with the theme here because this is just the side-project written in langauge not too familiar to me.
Well it seems that I perhaps should had wrote more about the initial situation, but I didn't want to lenghten the start too much. But Frodo got it just how I meant, so perhaps it's just small thing to add.
And repeat into the end: I'm not going to refine this story further. It's raw version and it will stay that way. Even though I'm writing it for you guys, I'm not going to waste too much time with it, because my main project must remain my main project. Sorry.
Well it seems that I perhaps should had wrote more about the initial situation, but I didn't want to lenghten the start too much. But Frodo got it just how I meant, so perhaps it's just small thing to add.
And repeat into the end: I'm not going to refine this story further. It's raw version and it will stay that way. Even though I'm writing it for you guys, I'm not going to waste too much time with it, because my main project must remain my main project. Sorry.
...70 years... LOL
#103
greywolf
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Posted 09 July 2007 - 03:23 AM
I re-read the first bit of part two again, and while I could see how you could understand that Alesha wasn't as connected to her husband as I thought, I personally didn't think there was enough concrete stuff to make it positive (but that could just be me assuming from the start that most married couples love each other ).
I hope you take at least some of the stuff from this and incorporate it into your main novel. You've got lots of raw talent, and you just need to refine it.
). I hope you take at least some of the stuff from this and incorporate it into your main novel. You've got lots of raw talent, and you just need to refine it.
#104
Juni Ori
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Posted 09 July 2007 - 03:33 AM
Looking the picture as whole, this actually is kind of important part of my bigger story, but not crucial nor necessary. Perhaps, just perhaps, I'll refine this one day. Remember that the first (unnumbered) part of Tai Cara's story was from my book. Well, now it seems they have grown into separate books, so from the second one. Anyways, thank you all who've participated and have given feedback, in this case even very good and intelligent, I really do appreaciate it.
Another reason why I'm doing this, not just to please you guys, is to improve my skills in English. Therefor all ideas how to rephrase my text somehow are also very welcome. And thank you for your kind words!
Anyways, thank you all who've participated and have given feedback, in this case even very good and intelligent, I really do appreaciate it.Another reason why I'm doing this, not just to please you guys, is to improve my skills in English. Therefor all ideas how to rephrase my text somehow are also very welcome. And thank you for your kind words!
...70 years... LOL
#105
taikara
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Posted 10 July 2007 - 12:08 AM
It does feel weird commenting on a story that has a character even loosely based on myself... 
Anyway, I think your writing style (language issues considered) is still Tolkienesque, but you've broken into some more descriptively interpersonal writing, which I personally feel adds a whole lot more depth.
Content-wise, there were a few things I didn't really understand - mainly terms, but I think I'm missing the in-story encyclopedia that would probably be a part of the final publication, as well as some backstory Overall, I think it is very enjoyable, and I think you're a good story-weaver.
Thanks to Frodo for encouraging our budding author to write more, and thanks of course to Juni for writing and having the courage to post it publically, I enjoyed it.
Anyway, I think your writing style (language issues considered) is still Tolkienesque, but you've broken into some more descriptively interpersonal writing, which I personally feel adds a whole lot more depth.
Content-wise, there were a few things I didn't really understand - mainly terms, but I think I'm missing the in-story encyclopedia that would probably be a part of the final publication, as well as some backstory
Overall, I think it is very enjoyable, and I think you're a good story-weaver.Thanks to Frodo for encouraging our budding author to write more, and thanks of course to Juni for writing and having the courage to post it publically, I enjoyed it.
..<[[[Tofu Ninja of the Pickasldawessle Order]]]>..
doodoodoo!!!
QUOTE (Tai - in response to DD on how people who fear change are like cats)
you mean the "you moved my litterbox, so I'm going to pee in your clothes hamper" attitude?
Yes, I just quoted myself. ph34r my T4i-F00!!. doodoodoo!!!
